At times I forget how things make me feel. I’m just numb, there to accept whatever they throw at me. And what of it? I’m not mindful. I’m not aware. I’m just there. If I’m lucky enough then I register the senses. But if not, I’m not there. I am but my mind is not Continue reading

The Hollow Men  Spiritual decay  Effect on people Men without meaning, lacking meaning that makes them whole  Reversal of personification Enjambment repeat of “we are the hollow men / stuffed men” Echo  Section 4 the eyes evoke the heavenly eyes in section 2  The human and non human Object  Puppets Hollow but recognition that we Continue reading

Audit from an unknown branch of the government… constant questioning, deconstructing K. Goes round and round, till he faces the audit not as an disruption but a part of his being. “The protagonist, whom we’ll call Josef, is an average office worker leading a monotonous, unremarkable life. One day, without warning, he is informed that Continue reading

Took Hoya to the emergency. Just to check that the dumplings that she ate was ok. Problem: they contained green onions. Very minimal, but doctor recommends me to make sure. So I went. And had to call poison control, which I called yesterday but didn’t follow through because of the 100+ consultation fee. They were Continue reading

Chinese New year. Prepped for 5 guests. Tiring. Hosting is tiring. Chicken wings salmon pork rib soup dumplings steak oh and hoya ate some dumplings too, which leads to Sunday’s post… but man, coup was fun. all these mind games Continue reading

Sunny’s was disappointing today. Heavily oiled eggplant, bland and normal. Garnish on top (garlic, xo…?) gave it flavour, but otherwise was meh. HK black pepper was too peppery. The grains were too big, so that the whole dish was too salty and too much. Once you get to the bottom of the dish, the vegetables Continue reading

Ears plugged.nausea.The floor spins. I am an object.Things become me. Shadows? Beyond the self through others. Four years have taught me:Roots. ie the branch between me and others. Escape. Continue reading

– Sick. Headache, hard to breathe, back pain, plugged ears, sorethroat. – -  Didn’t go to class at 11. Whatever. – Took hoya out for a walk in the morning. – Had a smoothie, stocks, cleaned up, wrote- Piano. I just can’t get Goldberg’s 5th variation right. – The sun came out and the whole Continue reading

Woke up at 9, stocks, took hoya out. She’s more happy to go out now than the night. It’s a part of my morning routine now–hoya and I. It’s no beach walk, but it’s good enough. Then, I had some toast and biked to class. Faster than uber. And Toronto’s also getting warmer. The sun’s Continue reading

Done nothing all week, all day. Been an absolute bum. Yeah that’s me. and you know what, I’ve done much more than I’ve planned, because I’ve planned nothing. Because I’ve planned everything, and I’ve planned nothing. Because I have all these plan, but I didn’t have a backup plan for my plan, so technically, to Continue reading