YuHeng's blog

slaves of effect.

I am… choose to be free at the cost of having nothing

rather than “free” because i possess a thing or two

I hold things off. till over the edge. Pass the deadline. i dont know. I dont care. I dont care for deadlines. They matter to me. But their consequences don’t. I confront them head on. I mind them, mind you. But a certain nonchalance carries with me. Money? No. actually I cant say for sure. Am i guaranteed for life that I’ll have no money issue? No. Recently, I’m thinking that all things actually pass through money. Because of its universality. For all things can be leveraged by money. Money can stand in the place for too many things, almost too many, and so if one ever thinks of anything of any spiritual value, sentimental, or mental, there is at least something that passes through money. Ie. to buy books, or to even borrow books (a library card. no it does not cost money, but it costs other things: transit, time, labour, sacifice of other things at the expense of your time–of your hourly “wage”). the cost of everything is either negated or more. But it is never zero, for even at zero, such absence permeates and destroys whatever it runs over, much like the dharma: “in the destruction of family, the eternal dharma of family perishes; when dharma perishes, its absence also conquers the whole family.” And it is such propagation like fire, that I do not wish to have everything go through money, to be in the trenches of down-washed money, whether the sum is nada or not. For there are instantiations of such absence. 1) the absence of money. and 2) the absence of having the problem of money. The former is self explanatory but the latter is especially potent potent because what absence does the presence of money still hold when the fundamental necessity is satisfied? or when upon the higher progression of the Hegelian order, this trouble does not refer to the same trouble of the lack of…

So within the complexes of the continuation of money or should i say, consciousness (each awareness at different levels refers to specific meaning of words and relations), I think it boils down to the notion of the excluded middle more, that the dichotomy of logic here says nothing more than our “penchant for simplicity.” Because in short, money or not, the lack of it or its possession brings worries. But more importantly, the equivalent of it to losing dharma is its total conquer of logic itself with the polarized dialectic of money.

Sunday

An illusion? An illusion is an illusion. How do i know if it is an illusion. The mind in a vat problem? Solipsism? Well very simply, is it practical. Is it pragmatic. Does it have any use to me in my every day life.

To reduce words down to words of fewer words, for each word represents something else, of further words, and each word denotes another meaning, and so to reduce words means to select the best, targeted denotations, of selections underlying the words. When we then select words, we must not only choose words, but the meanings which it denotes.

I have said to diminish the account on which I use abstract and vague words. but they are really general facts that I wish to posit, rather than affirm or deny. for example, I might say if a group belongs to another group, then all of the parts which the former group is of, necessarilly belongs to the parts of the latter group. This doesn’t say much because of its lack of particulairies. But it does say some relations or states or connexion betwen the groups. And here, I’m not even trying to say any particulars. But only to prove the connexion with which they are correlated. And so no facts pertain to any of this, and I do not intent to prove any means in that regard. So if my intention is to set out the connexion between certain relations, there is no harm in using abstract words or simply words without particularities that constituent the proposition.

But in real life, I am pragmatic. I’d like to ground my actions on a hard, concrete floor from which useful behaviours can arise, despite an unbearable, light wondering of the mind.