YuHeng's blog

“It’s not a problem. It has been a problem all along. I won’t tell you that it is not. Because it is. It’s a manifestation of what was not solved before, and it will creep up on me again if I don’t solve it. So it goes. The problem doesn’t just go away like that. It’s much more complex. And it will likely stay. So, up till now I’ve had it a certain way. I do not think that there is a right way.”

So being a manifestation which suggests a process that goes along, a continuation of processes and the appearance of the whole of consequences, one must not reduce it immediately to the spheres of wholes or parts as in the problem to see a problem as a greater problem is only a sublimation to a greater whole. But it provides a foundation on which explanations can ground themselves. Why is the problem like this etc. Well because there was a prior problem. But it’s not really about the problems in the end. it’s about the attitude. It’s about the way you see this problem. The problem isn’t there. And it has nothing to do the problem. It’s you.

“I’ve seen people scraped to the poorest and the rich, and the poor acted as if they were not or the richest and the richest were well, only in their own perception of wealth, wealthy. But it wouldn’t be wrong to say that there is no rich and conversely, the poor. There are many. But for the poor, for the truly poor, no such thing exists. It’s simply not there.”

I’m thinking less and less about the way things ought to go. I think that means a separation from reality because of a bonding with truth. The way ought to go. Slowly, I no longer care for the whole thing of illusions and dreams. They don’t mean much to me now. Whether that’s becoming a part of me I don’t know. I don’t care now. Or rather, I don’t mind it now. They can be there or be in the back of my head. In short, their presence do bother me. Not anymore at least. Sometimes I’ll walk by and say hello. And they’ll say hello back. But sometimes not. I don’t think it’s a big deal. I don’t think there’s any need for me to think that they are there. I have eyes. I can see. I don’t think about it. I might start some time and the realization might freak me out but still I’ll get used to it. The revelation didn’t tell me that they were there. They were always there. That’s what the realization reminded me of. And I can stop worrying about it because I know I can’t do anything about it. They were always there. But the realization… well, its not really about that, is it. Just as they were always there, so too was the realization always there. I just need to see that it is there. That’s all. Kind of a like a shadow. (personify the realization).

“You see, the thing with editing is that for those who think they can edit as they write is to abstract themselves away from the content and write as if they’ve left it for months and only just returned to it. But that’s impossible. Not if you’re some genius but the ways of genius or anyone are unknown to us. So what makes you think that you can edit along the way? What makes you think that you could stop on the way here? Please, just come and worry about those things later.”