YuHeng's blog

Sometimes I feel like I don’t even exist, like I’m just there, you know. And sometimes what I say don’t make sense, but I go on saying it just so I can make sense of it but even then… do I know myself if I do not know the others, on whom I depend and exist… Does consciousness or deliberation diminish once another argument counters it, such that it is continuously reduced to a smaller size and inflates on its own importance. And by that, I mean the sense of which people dream. The sense that one holds onto when they have nothing to hold on. They grow faint. And I also grow faint but I just hide behind them and be a part.

“What is there to think of?” I think this is the sort of sense that we are speaking of when we speak of this kind of “thinking;” I’m not even thinking. That’s the thing. I just say what’s on my mind. And so, what is it that you have to make sense of?